As summer reaches it's zenith* I'm putting the finishing touches on my manuscript, with the plans to submit to agents in the fall. Or at least, I'm trying. To put on the finishing touches. Because apparently, I'm the writer equivalent of a fussy parent right before a Junior Fashion Pageant: I cannot stop making last-minute adjustments! I mean seriously, if I thought putting a little of my saliva on a tissue and wiping the face of the manuscript before sending it would somehow be helpful, I probably would.
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| This T-shirt is funny, because it's true. http://shirt.woot.com/derby/entry/13905/mom-spit-all-purpose-cleaner |
This is a wonderful way to psych myself out. I figure one of two things is going on. Either A) this manuscript is still far from being as polished as needs to be, or B) I've already passed the point of diminishing returns, and actually making things worse. Probably the truth is far less brutal; more than likely I would never be done, I could always find a little something to tweak here, a nice touch to add there. Sort of like the perfect holiday menu, as time goes by and tastes shift, there are always new things to try.
I have this dream that I will somehow bring each and every story to it's perfect state. All the errors will be corrected, every word perfectly chosen and arranged. Then - in this impeccable, limpid state - I will send it off to agents and editors with zero reservations what-so-ever. And when the inevitable rejections come in, I will know it is not because of a flaw with my writing, but rather because it's not what the agents are looking for at this time.
You like that fantasy? Should I add a couple unicorns and a field of magic corn stalks that actually hide chocolate waffle cones inside their husks? Because it's never going to happen, neither laws of probably nor my own psyche will permit it. The best I can do is quadruple-check for spelling errors and pray I didn't over-use my semi-colons.
I've got a ways to go yet, I'm only about 60% done researching agents for this round (can't use the same ones as the last manuscript, because this is a very different genre), and then I'll need to suffer my way though a synopsis. Again. And then compose query letters. Again.
Apparently, you can't be a writer without being a little bit of a masochist.
*Yeah, yeah, I know that's not technically the correct use of the word, but "zenith" is just too awesome a word not to slip in from time to time!
When I finished my novel an English prof at Rockford College asked to read it. She suggested that I change my hero from my heroine's guardian angel to a real human being. I did such and now I sort of wish I hadn't. I have rewritten parts about seven times and the last time I realized my book was so out of date that I should rewrite it entirely again. It is at a standstill. I hope I can turn my blog into a book one day. Keep the faith Z.D. You are a very good writer even if I am not into fantasy.
ReplyDeleteAw :( Trust me when I say there will always be things you will want to change. You'll want to change stuff even after publishing. In my own experience, it's a stall tactic because I'm nervous about putting my work out there for criticism. I feel your pain!
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