It's the most spookiest time of the year!
It's time for big bats,
and the blackest of cats,
time for pumpkins and spiders and rats
to come give us a fright
and then slink out of sight
'til we're scared of each shadow that's cast!
Yeah, it's not Shakespeare...heck, it's not even "Hallmark"...but it's not bad for off-the-top-of-my-head at 1pm on a Sunday afternoon. But if that doesn't give you that wonderful little creepy thrill that marks a good Halloween moment, maybe the following food entry will help. In keeping with our ghoulish, zombie-inspired October theme, I present an opportunity to devour the most symbolic of organs:
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| A Still-Beating Heart! |
Beef heart, to be precise. And no, it's not actually beating. But you could find one of those spooky-Halloween sound tracks that has a beating heart and play it in the background for effect, if you want.
Unless you either a) don't buy your own groceries, or b) don't ever bother to check the price of anything at the grocery store, you've probably noticed the price of beef is going up. Cheaper cuts like the tough roasts and boney-bits are looking more and more appealing. But the cheapest cut I've found is the heart. Which makes sense: this is a hunk of muscle that require a fair amount of work before you can cook it, and the idea of eating heart probably sounds unappealing to lots of people. But that's the whole point of our Halloween theme, after all! So I went ahead and purchased this 4 lb. blood-pumping wonder and got out my best knives to get it prepped.
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| Don't be scared, just start cutting! |
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| Slice and dice and SHRED and BITE AND TEAR...MUAH-HA-HAAA!! |
Once you've cut off the fat, you also get to trim away any membrane and tubules. You'll notice that beef heart, although it is a muscle, has a different texture than typical cuts of beef; the muscle fibers are shorter, and the grain a bit tighter. That means it could cook up tough if you let it. So between the texture and the trimming, I suggest cutting this into chunks for stewing. When it comes to stewing I like to use my slow-cooker, and let that long, low heat tenderize the meat and bring out the flavors. So here's my easy, all-purpose beef stew slow-cooker recipe. It's not my BEST stew recipe, but it is the easiest, and it works well with beef heart.
Z.D.'s Go-To Beef Stew
Ingredients:
3 Tablespoons olive oil
1/3 Cup all-purpose flour
Kosher salt
Freshly ground pepper
2.5 to 3 lb.s chunked beef heart
1 large yellow onion, cut into very thin wedges
1 large green bell pepper, cut into 1 to 1.5 inch chunks
1.5 Cups dry red wine
4 garlic cloves
14.5 oz crushed tomatoes
3 Tablespoons Hoisin sauce
1 teaspoon dried thyme
pinch of nutmeg
- Pour the oil into a large, heavy frying pan over medium heat. As it heats, whisk together the flour, salt and pepper in a large tupperware container with a tightly fitting lid. Toss in the beef, seal tightly and shake until the beef chunks are thoroughly coated. Cook the floured beef in the hot oil until browned on all sided, then remove the beef to a large slow-cooker.
- Toss the onion and the pepper into the hot frying pan and cook until starting to darken in places. Add the vegetables to the slow-cooker. Pour the wine into the pan and scrape up any browned bits on the bottom, letting the wine reduce to about 1 Cup. Pour into the slow cooker.
- Using a garlic press, press the garlic directly into the slow-cooker (you get the juices that way). Add all remaining ingredients, and cook on low heat for 7-8 hours. Season with salt and pepper to taste, and serve with good crusty bread to sop up tasty juices.
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| Behold the tasty tenderness that is severed, sliced and sauced heart! |