Scribbles & Munch

      I should be working on my manuscript; I have a couple precious hours of no work and no chores, and I really, REALLY should be working on my manuscript--but not before I share this awesome recipe!
      There's been a heat wave in Central Ohio for the last week, and Jeni's Splendid Ice Cream - the best thing to come out of Ohio since nominating Lincoln to run for president - has been closed. There was a listeria thing. Nobody got sick. But all the ice cream was dumped. And there has been many a tear of anguish.
       It left me with no choice but to make some of my own. My mother-in-law visits tomorrow, so I wanted it to be something extra delicious for her. So I made this...and it's everything you could ever want in a frozen dessert.

Z.D.'s Roasted Strawberry Balsamic Sherbet 

Ingredients:
4 Cups strawberries, green tops trimmed
1 Cup vanilla sugar
2 Tbs quality balsamic vinegar
1 & 1/3 Cup milk (not skim)
1/3 Cup plain Greek yogurt
1/8 tsp kosher salt

Directions:
 - Pre-heat your oven to 400º F. Halve or quarter berries into chunks roughly all the same size, place in a large glass baking dish and toss with the sugar (if the vanilla bean pieces from your vanilla sugar fall in, that's a good thing)! Roast in the oven for 30 minutes, stirring every 10 minutes. Remove from oven, allow to cool to room temperature.

Yeah, I didn't have time to take a lot of pictures. Here are the strawberries, BEFORE I cut them, tossed them with sugar, or roasted them. Y'know, in case you've never seen a strawberry before.

 - Stir the vinegar into the milk, and allow to sit for 5 minutes. Pour milk into a blender, followed by the yogurt and salt. Pour in the strawberries (removing any bits of vanilla bean), then blend on high speed until thoroughly combined. Chill for at least two hours, then give another quick burst of blending.

 - Pour into your ice cream maker, and churn according to the directions. Scrape into a freezable, sealable container, and freeze at least six hours before serving.

Your finished product with have a pale, dusty rose color, and a rich, not-overly sweet strawberry flavor.

      I'ma serve this tomorrow with a bittersweet chocolate brownie and a cup of earl grey tea. That's just how I roll.

      My old job is ending. I got a new job. This means that I will continue to be able to buy delicious food, and pay the electric bill that powers my laptop, enabling me to write. Yeeeaaay!
      However, it also entails a major shifting and re-settling of my schedule. This means for awhile, I'm not sure when I'll find the time to do my chores, buy my groceries, and make my meals, much less write stories and update the blog. Boooooo!
      The time stress is compounded by the Well-Deserved Celebration of All Things Maternal this weekend. So this is a short post to say: Readers, I love you. All twelve of you.* But I cannot guarantee regular postings for a couple weeks. While I figure out what the f@$% my world is going to look like for a little bit, priorities will be shifted, and my happy pattern of posting about writing during the week and a recipe on the weekend may take a hiatus. I'm not saying I won't post until June, I'm just saying be prepared for the schedule to be a bit wonky.
      I feel a bit wonky.
      Of course, that may have been the mojito. Not 100% sure on that.




*Ok, I don't know for a fact that it's only twelve, but here modesty and cynicism will collaborate to create what seems to be a reasonable number.

      There is little doubt that when it comes to cuisine, the French have it down. Within most ethnic palates, you run the gamut from snacky street food to fine dining (Japanese food, for example, offers everything from Chef Morimoto's Waikiki restaurant to the Yummy Teriyaki down the street).  But for the French, even their street snacks (crepes,* for example) have a level of sophistication that demand respect. So it's not wonder that their version of toast is better than normal! Rather than simply taking a slice of stale bread and disguising the flavor by toasting it, first they soak it in a custard, then they fry it in butter, then they add MORE butter and pour syrup on top!

I think my skillet loves it when I do this.

      Or maybe not...for all I know, the French didn't even invent the stuff, just like they didn't invent french fries. But who cares, french toast is bloody delicious, and really it's one of the easiest things to make, so long as you know the proper way to treat ingredients!
      When I was growing up, my father made french toast on weekends with regular, pre-sliced white sandwich bread, fresh from the plastic bag. And since I got to pour maple syrup all over it, I liked it just fine! But it only takes a few servings of french toast at various restaurants to realize that there are many, many variations out there. Some are good, some are not so good, and some are amazing. I've experimented with several recipes myself, and honestly there are about three versions I cycle through, depending on my mood. Today, my mood went back to the classic, a standard french toast recipe that's thick, and flavorful, and lovely on a drizzly spring morning.

Z.D.'s Basic French Toast with Walnuts and Bananas
serves two, multiply as desired

Ingredients:
6 slices French bread, about 1" thick, left out overnight to go stale**
6 eggs
1/2 Cup whole milk, divided
1 teaspoon vanilla
generous pinch kosher salt
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/8 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/3 Cup raw walnut pieces
clarified butter for greasing the pan (or unsalted, or shortening, or whatever)

To get the bread properly stale, I leave my slices out all night on their edges--if you lay them flat, the top will get stale, but the bottom will not.

Directions: 
 - Select a dish with sides at least 1" high, big enough to hold all your slices of toast side by side, but not with too much extra space. Crack your eggs directly into this dish.

My experience has taught me that good french toast almost inevitably requires one egg per slice of bread.

 - Add half of the milk, vanilla, salt, and spices. Beat thoroughly to combine. Your custard should be about as thick as natural cream, and a light but distinct yellow color. If it's too thick, add more milk until it reaches desired consistency.

And then...whisk!

 - Set in your slices of stale bread so they are flat, side by side. Allow to soak for about 8-10 minutes.

You want all your bread to lay flat, but without a bunch of extra space, since that means the custard is spread out and won't absorb as easily.

 - In the meantime, heat a large, dry skillet over medium heat. Throw in your walnut pieces and toast, stirring every few minutes, until fragrant and starting to turn golden in spots. Remove from heat and set aside.

Toasting nuts have to be one of the best smells in the world!

 - Turn over your toast and allow the dry side to soak up the remaining custard. If you find that your bread has absorbed too much and there are dry spots on the bottom of your soaking dish, break another egg or two into a cup, add a Tablespoon of milk and a dash of cinnamon and vanilla. Beat the heck out of it, then pour it into your pan and tilt so that it reaches the bottoms of all the bread. Allow 4-5 minutes to soak.

That's what you're looking for!

 - Wipe out your skillet with a clean, damp cloth, and place over medium-high heat. Grease lightly with clarified butter (or whatever). Check your slices of bread: if there are any that have dry spots or hard crust, let them soak longer. If you have pieces that are nicely soaked through, lay them in your hot pan. Cook for a minute, then reduce the heat to medium.

Just keep the first pieces warm in a low temperature oven.

 - Cook for another 2-3 minutes or until brown on one side. Flip, and cook until the other side is nicely browned and the toast is cooked through, about 3-4 minutes. Repeat with remaining slices.

It never ceases to amaze me how much custard that bread soaks up!

 - Top with toasted walnuts, sliced bananas, and a drizzle of syrup (or in this case, caramel sauce).

Now THAT's breakfast!

      Of course there are other ways to top french toast, including strawberries and whipped cream, good quality fruit preserves, powdered sugar and maple syrup, or even ice cream. Or you could go a savory route and make a Monte Cristo sandwich (YUMMM)! For other variations, try switching out your spices: instead of cinnamon, try a double dose of cardamom, or maybe ground grains of paradise! You can also add a bit of honey or maple syrup to the custard for an extra touch of sweetness. But whatever you do, eat the toast while it's warm and fragrant, and don't make so much that you can't eat it all in one sitting--re-heating french toast is an exercise in rubbery flavorlessness. It's better to make a fresh batch from scratch!



*Yes, I will do a post on crepes in the near future. Promise.

**Why stale bread? Because it absorbs the custard more quickly, and retains more of it while cooking. And the custard bath is where your flavor is!

      It's spring, and the warm weather, beautiful scenery, and gentle sunshine tempts us outside with timeless allure. Go outside and play. Then, when you're tired, go to the movie theater and see "EX MACHINA."

      I'm so out of the loop that I hadn't even heard of this movie until my husband saw it while looking for something to do last weekend. It has high review scores (78 on Metacritic), and the trailer intrigued me immediately. So we wrangled up a couple of our best sci-fi friends and went to go watch.
      I'll just come out and say it: this movie is fucking awesome. I'm a big fan of "Her," but I honestly can't recommend it to everybody because I think it got sufficiently intellectual at points that it could leave some audience members behind. "EX_MACHINA" remedies that with a simple genre shift: instead of being a philisophical AI sci-fi romantic comedy/drama, it's an AI sci-fi thriller. If you like a psychological thriller, you're going to like this movie. The suspense builds slowly and inexorably, and keeps you guessing until the end. You don't need to be a geek to get it. The basic science language you need to understand what's going on is laid out simply and quickly at the beginning, and you're ready to roll.
      Now if you're a little more cerebral and like a movie that makes you think - like me - then you are in for a real treat with this one. The acting is flawless. Domhnall Gleeson and Oscar Isaac present characters that are utterly believable. They feel familiar, like people you've already met, or at least heard about in the news. And like real people, the more you get to know them the stronger your emotional reactions to them (by the end, my reactions were visceral). And Alicia Vikander as the AI...I honestly don't want to say anything. Just go see the movie.
      Director Alex Garland clearly paid scrupulous attention to every detail of this film, with marvelous results. The visuals are powerful; from the very beginning, nature and man-made artifacts are juxtaposed in beautiful, provocative contrast. The colors and textures draw you in. The sounds (or absence thereof, in certain circumstances) each serve a purpose, forcing your brain to pay attention.
      And then there's my favorite part of a good movie: all the THINKING I do afterwards! (Although I'm not writing spoilers, you may want to wait to read the next two paragraphs until after you've seen the flick--I wouldn't want to unduly influence your initial reactions.)

      This was such a thought provoking film! Nuance and symbolism abound as the story progresses. There are clear literary ties to Frankenstein, the Book of Genesis, and Pygmalion of ancient Greek mythology. For scientific inspiration, I found nods to behavioral modification, Freudian ideas of female psychology, and even comments on contemporary academia and research methodologies. And of course there is tremendous philosophical influence, ranging from Nietzsche to Robert Jensen. I'm sure I'll think of more as I continue to reflect on the film--a thought provoking movie is the gift that keeps on giving!
      Now, if you've seen the movie and are ready to do just a little more thinking, I challenge you with this question: imagine the film precisely as it was, but with each character's gender reversed. Yeah...tell me that doesn't get your brain going!

      If you want a movie experience that leaves you both entertained and feeling like your IQ did a few sit-ups, "EX_MACHINA" will not disappoint. And if you just want to see a good psychological thriller, you can't go wrong with this movie, either!

      Ok, first things first: you do know, don't you, that there was a devastating earthquake in Nepal? The death toll is literally rising by the hour, with continuing aftershocks, some of which are reaching the same magnitude as Seattle's Nisqually quake of 2001 (6.8). So are you getting a tax return this spring? Great--so spare $25 (or more) and chip in for the relief. There are lots of great ways to help out, but my favorite is the United Nations International Children's Emergency Fund (UNICEF). Go for it.

      Now that you've done your good deed for the day, you can reward yourself with chocolate! And not just any chocolate--chocolate for breakfast! My grandmother ate chocolate cake for breakfast for decades, and was a pretty healthy woman who lived to a comfortable old age. I want to be just like her. But sometimes, eating slices of Devil's Food Cake with Fudge Frosting first thing in the morning isn't what I'm looking for. I need something that still feels breakfasty. I looked high and low, and found my options wanting. I found plenty of muffins and coffee cakes containing chocolate chips. And of course I have my trusty Chocolate Zucchini Muffins, but none of those were really scratching the itch.
      Then I remembered those Costco muffins I ate as a kid. You know the ones I'm talking about: the ones as big as an infant's head, studded with chocolate chips, that come four at a time in that cardboard pallet with 4 poppyseed (pretty tasty), 4 blueberry (meh), and four Mystery Strudel muffins (meeehhhhh). There was something wickedly satisfying about biting into one of those enormous pastries, and they weren't half bad. But ultimately they had that processed baked good flavor that promised to stay moist and mold-free for a suspiciously long time, and the chocolate flavor was...well...not completely genuine. Plus the size basically guarantees diabetes if you eat one of those a day. So I took them a my inspiration and started mixing my own Ultimate Chocolate Muffin.

      I chose to use cocoa powder and chocolate chips, because the muffin itself should be chocolatey, and those little bursts of pure chocolate add so much. I also decided to use a bit of spelt flour, to add a little nuttiness to the flavor and pretend that I'm making health food. Finally, I decided to add a bit of chopt walnut to the top. This is for crunch, protein, and - again - to pretend that I'm being healthy. The result was a tender, chocolatey muffin that deeply satisfied! It hit all the right flavors and textures, felt like an honest-to-goodness treat, but still tasted like breakfast. So it is with great satisfaction that today I give you:

Z.D.'s Start-Your-Day-With-Chocolate Muffins

Ingredients:
3/4 Cup (1.5 sticks) unsalted butter, room temp
1/3 Cup white sugar
1/3 Cup brown sugar, packed
1 tsp vanilla
1 Cup all-purpose flour
1/2 Cup spelt flour
3/4 tsp kosher salt
3/4 tsp baking soda
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 Cup cocoa powder
2 eggs
2/3 C milk (not skim)
1/3 C Greek yogurt (not non-fat)
3/4 Cup chocolate chunks*
1/3 Cup finely chopt walnuts

Directions:
 - Pre-heat your oven to 350º F, and prep 2 dozen regular-size muffin cups either by lining them with paper liners, or greasing them (I like clarified butter for greasing, myself).
 - Using an electric stand mixer, beat the butter, sugars, and vanilla on high speed until light and fluffy, about 6 minutes.

In the past I've been impatient with this stage of baking, and haven't allowed sufficient time for my butter to become truly "light and fluffy." But I'm telling you, give it a couple extra minutes, and the final texture will pay off incredibly! Just keep scraping the sides down with a rubber spatula and ask yourself, "Does this really seem fluffy?" And if the answer's "no," let it keep beating for a couple more minutes.

 - Meanwhile, in a medium bowl whisk together the flours, salt, soda, and baking powder. Then sift in the cocoa powder. Whisk to thoroughly combine.

No sifter? No problem! A fine-mesh sieve does the trick just fine.

 - Add the eggs one at a time to the butter mixture, beating on high speed for at least one full minute before adding the next.

Another baking stage I always wanted to skimp on. You really can't over-mix at this stage, just let those eggs get beaten in like there's no tomorrow! When you're done, the mixture will be fluffy and yellow, like a good vanilla buttercream.

 - In a small bowl (or large measuring cup) stir together the milk and yogurt until thoroughly combined. Reduce your mixer to low speed, then alternate adding the flour and milk mixtures, beginning and ending with the flour. Stir in the chocolate chunks.

Looking chocolatey? Oh, yes, it's chocolatey!

 - Fill each muffin cup about 2/3rds with your batter, and sprinkle the top of each with about a teaspoon of the walnuts. Bake 16-18 minutes, until a toothpick inserted comes out with only a few most crumbs attached.

And with the walnuts on top, it HAS to be healthy!

      I kept these muffins comparatively low in sugar, which actually helps the chocolate flavor stand out and - frankly - makes them way better for you than chocolate breakfast cereals. A couple of these beauties go a long way, so pair with a good protein, a big portion of fruit, and a nice cup of your caffeinated beverage of choice, and you have a breakfast of champions, my friend. And the nice thing about muffins is that they'll keep a for a few days if you just leave them in the tins and lightly cover with plastic wrap. So that hectic Monday you're dreading tomorrow? You already know it's going to start on a good note: chocolate.



*I've said it before, and I'll say it again--don't waste your money on chocolate chips! Buy big blocks of quality baking chocolate and chop them yourself! The taste and texture will be much better, and a better value for your money.

      Happy World Book Day!
      I've already given out five physical books and six eBooks today--I hope you are similarly promoting the holiday either by reading, writing, or sharing the printed page!
      And for you, fair reader, here is a free book as well! Or, at least a link to a page from my friend Camela Thompson's blog, because today she is generously giving away free copies of the first book in her series, "The Hunted." The second book comes out soon, so don't worry, you don't be in suspense long.

Happy reading!

      You've heard me mention things like National Eggs Benedict Day (April 15th), National Chocolate Chip Cookie Day (August 4th), and National Surf & Turf Day (February 29th--only happens on leap year!). But there is more to me than food. Really. So I'm jubilant to draw your attention a WORLDWIDE holiday that, in my opinion, checkmates them all: World Book Day is April 23rd! This event was founded on the 379th anniversary of Shakespeare's death,* in part to keep the spirit of the Bard alive. But the main idea (as you can likely guess from the title of the event) is to celebrate reading good books!

One of my bookcases. Yes, that is a Freud action figure in the upper right hand corner.

      While this event has thrived in Great Britain for twenty years, it's had difficulty taking off in the U.S. There was a national non-profit to proliferate the idea, but last year it closed down due to poor funding and support. Apparently plenty of people were happy to read books - even hand out free books to strangers - but paying for said books and funding the advertising to spread the word...well...that was harder to do.
      I'm sad to report I haven't found a single independent bookstore in my area that is celebrating World Book Day this year. I'm going to call them today and ask about that, see if they'll throw something together last minute. But I am not going to stop there! Truth is, I've got at least a half-dozen books on my shelves I've been meaning to donate to Goodwill. So on Thursday, I plan on making myself a T-shirt that says, "Ask me about World Book Day!" I'll carry around my books in a canvas bag, and anybody who actually asks about my T-shirt may have a book for free. Maybe they'll even be inspired to give a book to somebody else--or at least mark their calendar for next year!
      In my experience, most people have read at least one book that they really loved**, so they like the idea of encouraging others to read. It's just that reading is sort of stationary, and hobbywise many people perceive it as being "meek," "nerdy," or "stodgy." Especially when you add the whole British part. So those misconceptions need to be mixed up with fun, goofy, shake-people-out-of-their-complacency events such as World Book Day/Night! I invite you to come up with something you can do, whether privately or publicly, so celebrate this event, and I want to know about it!
      Fill me in, either with what you're doing this year, or plans for next year. If I have something published by next year (a veeeery long shot, but a girl can dream), I will even send you a dozen of my books to hand out!


*Or World Book Night, depending on who you ask. Or maybe when you do most of your reading.
**Some of us have loved too many to count!