As I've previously related, I am in the process of moving.  And that process just got longer, because we just learned that rather than joining me next month, my spouse will not be joining me for another year.  Because medical professions can be really, really unreasonable sometimes.*
      That means my hectic life just became my even more hectic and waaaaaay more unpredictable life for awhile.  And of course, it's the writing that suffers.  How much so?  It took me a solid week to write 5 pages.  Double spaced.  With zero corrections, because I don't have time.
      So priority #1 in the Maintaining My Sanity department will be working out a daily schedule/strategy for getting in more writing.  Fortunately, I have been finding time for cooking, especially with all the spring holidays.  But since none of the recipes were my own I can't share them here.  I will instead share with you a picture of the lemons we used to make our dessert...

The one on the left is a Meyer lemon, the best thing to happen to citrus since Satsumas.  The one on the right is a Ponderosa lemon, which is the weirdest thing to happen to citrus since Kumquats.

      ...and a picture of the dessert that we made.

Except we only used Meyer lemons in this.  The Ponderosa was fun, but ultimately far too acidic - and even a touch bitter - for this lovely, lemony dessert.

*If you work in the medical profession and are reading this, you are likely making some sort of snorting sound and muttering, "...unreasonable ALL the damn time."  And you would be correct.

      I'm in the process of moving from one side of the country to the other.  That means switching three time zones, and literally going from one edge of the continent to the opposite edge.  And it means I'm buying more packing tape than I ever imagined.

      The one time I watched television during my time in Kauai last month was to watch the Oscars.  I was fully aware of the controversy surrounding the lack of ethnic minorities among the nominees, and I wanted to see if/how the Academy would respond.  I was not disappointed.  I thought this was one of the best, most intelligent, most socially conscientious Academy Awards I've ever seen.*
      It also brought to mind an issue I have struggled with as a writer for many years.  I happen to believe that popular media - TV, movies, music, and particularly books - are among the most effective tools for combating social prejudices.  Human beings judge what is "normal" and "acceptable" by our own experience, whether it's real or entertainment.  This is part of the reason the ethnic majority in any given country (but especially White Americans) have a hard time really empathizing with minorities: they assume their own experiences are typical, because they see it confirmed all over the place!  It's hard to understand your privilege if you're perpetually surrounded by it, just like it's hard for a swimming fish to understand that it's wet.

The real reason these goldfish have googly-eyes?  They discover this totally dry atmosphere up above them, and it BLOWS their MIND!  ...and two minutes later they discover this totally dry atmosphere up above them, and it BLOWS their MIND! ...and two minutes later they discover this totally dry atmosphere up above them, and it BLOWS their MIND!

      I'm not judging or blaming here; this is just how the human brain works.  It takes a lot of continual effort to be aware of and combat this atmosphere of "normalcy."  Which is why it's important for people to be exposed to things that are different: different ethnicities, different religions, different cultures, different ideas, etc.  And the most palatable way to do this is through entertainment.
      Which brings me back to being a writer.  I want to have characters that are not the majority, aka: white, middle-class heterosexuals.  Writing women is easy for me because I'm a woman, and I have no trouble writing men.  I also feel pretty comfortable writing characters of all different sexual orientations.  With enough research I feel reasonably confident that I can write characters of different religious backgrounds.  What I don't feel comfortable writing is main characters of different ethnic/racial backgrounds.
      I want to, but then I feel like I shouldn't.  My brain runs around and around in circles like a dog chasing it's tail.  I'll break it down for you:

ONE HAND: I don't want to relegate all the ethnic minorities in my novels to being 'friends' or other minor characters. There is no reason this female protagonist need to be Caucasian.  I'll make her African American!

OTHER HAND: Really? And what do you - O Pasty Privileged One - know about being African American, and how that might affect this character's thoughts, experiences, and actions?

ONE HAND: Um...what I've read...and studied in Cultural Sensitivity Trainings...and seen in movies....

OTHER HAND: [gives withering look]

ONE HAND: Well, I've got a couple close friends who are African American, and we've talked about issues and experiences.

OTHER HAND: And you think a few episodes of lunch chit-chat qualifies you?

ONE HAND: Er...no.  That's pretty presumptive of me, thinking I can just wade in and write a convincing minority.  I don't want to be a Rudyard Kipling, full of good intent and unfortunate stereotypes.

OTHER HAND: That's what I thought.

ONE HAND: [defeated] Ok, I'll keep my main characters Caucasian.

OTHER HAND: [horrified] So all the ethnic minorities will be 'friends' and minor characters?

Aaaand around and around it goes.  This guy's had way more success than I have.

      Occasionally, some radical solutions come to mind, such as including extensive, self-deprecating disclaimers in the novel's forward. Or taking a few years of American Minority Studies courses at my local university.  They all end up smacking of intellectualization, when what I'm going for is human soul.  So here I am, baring my idiocy to the world (Hi, World!) in the hopes of getting some good advice from other writers.
      And in the meantime, I'll do what I should have done a long time ago: discuss my dilemma with my ethnic minority friends.  I think they're too nice to laugh at me...for more than an hour.



*Not to mention Lady Gaga and Vice-President Biden brought me to tears.  Ironically, the part I found the least sincere and engaging was when the President of the Academy - a black woman - came out on stage to address the accusations of "white washing" and pledging to do more.  She never said what they would do.  It came across as an empty gesture.  Weird.

      Because I love food, and frankly enjoy any excuse to celebrate just about anything positive, I get a big kick out of food holidays.  This is why in the past few weeks, I've informed readers about National Cherry Pie Day (February 20th), National Sticky Bun Day (February 21st), and National Surf n' Turf Day (February 29th--only happens once every four years, so you know it's important).

The years may change, but food is always delicious!

      Coming up in March I intend to celebrate a lot of things: St. Patrick's Day I'll do corned beef and potato hash; Spring Equinox I'll cook something with saffron and either leeks or asparagus (probably this); and Easter I'll bake a lemon dessert of some kind, per family tradition.  Also in the third month of the year I will observe National "Eat Your Noodles" Day (March 11th), National Oatmeal Cookie Day (March 19th), National Water Day (March 22nd--and if you live in Flint, Michigan, you know just how important this holiday is), and probably National Clam Day on March 31st.  Alas, I missed National Poundcake Day on March 4th, but I'll make up for it later.
      But now you have a chance to influence history.  You have a chance to add your voice - and your vote - to the culinary calendar of celebrations.  There is currently a petition before the White House to make March National Hazelnut Appreciation Month!  To make this happen, we need people to sign the petition.  Specifically, we need over 900,000 people to sign this petition.  You can be one of them.
      No gimmicks, no sales, no spam.  Just add your name.  Why hazelnuts?  Nutella, for one thing. Hazelnut Brown Ale for another.  Or a lovely gluten-free flour.  And how about as a source of vitamins, protein, and deliciousness in general?

Also known as filberts.  But that just sounds silly.

      Let's face it: this is the most divisive election year in U.S. living history.  But certainly we can all rally around the delicious hazelnut for, dare I say it, an entire month!*  I call on all good citizens to do their duty by one of Oregon state's primary crops, and add a little patriotism to your kitchen.






*Unless, of course, you're allergic to tree nuts.  In which case I apologize for my insensitivity.

      Hi!  I just got back to Ohio from Hawai'i!  That's a 7 hour time difference!  I was on planes for a total of 9.5 hours, and in cars for a total of 4!  In other words, my brain is in a state somewhere between hallucinatory and happy-go-lucky!  So hide my car keys!
      Yet despite this, I'm going to blog.  And just for sheet entertainment value, I'm not going to edit this at all--not even spell-check.  So you get an idea of my raw talent.  Or...whatever.
      Top three things that inspired my writerly self on this trip:

#1 - Native Hawai'ian mythology.  How the heck have I been missing that?  It is rich and beautiful and full of cool gods and ghosts and Brownie-like figures known as Menehune.  I'm embarrassed that I've been going to Hawai'i since I was a little kid and never bothered to really research the lore.  Once I have finished moving, the first book I will get from the library will be about Hawai'ian mythology.

#2 - Politics.  Or rather, trying my damndest to avoid them.  I WAS ON VACATION!!!  But since stupid is everywhere, I used this awesomeness to get Donald Drumpf* out of my head.

I'm not supposed to talk politics on my blog, lest is alienate potential readers.  Some things are more important than getting new readers.

@3 - Hardcore History!  One of my new favorite podcasts!  I've always been fond of history, but there's just so damn much of it (no, I'm actually being serious), it's hard to keep up.  Besides, reading history books is always a bit of a gamble: the good ones are very, very good, and the dry ones are very, very plentiful.  What I love about Hardcore History is that a) it's a podcast, so I can multitast while listening; b) it's analytical, meaning that I not only get the facts but I get interpretation to go with them, and c) it's related like a good story told over dinner.  Which means it's easy to listen to.  I've heard two complete thus far, and now I'm 3.5 episodes into World War One.  And man, that is good history!
      I especially think history is important as a writer.  It provides context for characters and place-setting.  And no, just because you're writing a contemporary story doesn't mean you get to ignore it--every setting, every family, and even every building has history to it.  We're influenced by that history every day, it's just such a part of our lives we take it for granted.  Don't.  Know your history.
      Another good reason to know your history is that the number of crazy bizarre things that have happened in real life will blow your mind.  I love fantasical fiction, whether it's sci-fi, contemporary fairy tales, romantic horror, or high fantasy.  But that just makes the shocking events of real history that much more astounding.  So if you're looking for ideas - or hesitating over an idea, because you think, "that's too over-the-top, nobody would believe that" - do your research.  You don't need dragons to make events incredible.

      And finally, if you're going to the island of Kauai any time soon, I recommend dinner at Red Salt, rum tasting at Koloa rummery, getting a massage from these awesome people, kyaking and hiking up to Uluwehi falls on a rainy day (fewer other hikers), donating money at the local Humane Society (they'll let you borrow a dog for a day!), buying your groceries at the farmer's markets, and celebrating with a bottle of Nani Moon mead!

And don't feed the chickens, which are - and I mean this - freaking everywhere on that island.

*No, that's not a misspelling.  Watch the video.